Honoring All of Our Emotions is an Act of Love

Holistic Tools to Ease the Process of Change & Grief

Letting Go is the Only Way to Create Space for New

"It's okay to not be okay."

It’s that pressure in the chest that wants to push out tears. It’s the trembling that stirs with sadness running as deep as the gut.

This is grief asking to be released from our body, our heart, mind, and soul.

We so often think of grief as related with death of loved ones or the loss of serious relationships, but it’s more than that.

It can arise from the loss of a job, a certain standard of health, certain skills, or our role in particular communities or places. Grief can be felt in a loss of comfort in what was once comfortable. We can grieve the time that we feel we “lost” through harm to ourselves or others, to not knowing then what we know now.

Grief is felt from the life that we haven’t lived because of other patterns we’ve been stuck in, like illness, dependencies, or harmful relationships.

It’s what we feel when we surpass those illnesses, addictions, or relationships, and people don’t get that either: when our lives no longer hold something, even if it was harmful to us, we feel loss, and therefore, we experience grief.

Grief is the weight of the past that sits in our chest and gut, asking us to let it surface when it presents itself and to be expressed as a form of love—love for ourselves through the process of change, and love for what or whom we’re learning to let go of and live without.

Honoring All of Our Emotions is an Act of Love

"Grief never ends, but it changes. It is a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness nor a lack of faith: it is the price of love."

Just like any of our more challenging emotions, many of our modern cultures shy away from them and ask that we “just move on” or “get over it,” disrespecting natural processes and feelings that keep us human, whole, and healthy because when we avoid feeling our wide range of emotions, we put ourselves at risk of numbing ourselves into dependency and illness, which for many of us, is a source of our grief to begin with.

Our nervous system also naturally protects us from feeling what we’re not yet ready to feel. We need to feel safe for difficult emotions to be expressed.

Because Jyllin.com mostly focuses on the causes and symptoms of chronic stress, which include emotions and consumption, honoring the grieving process is crucial when changing lifestyle patterns that induce stress.

This means that when stopping smoking, or drinking, or bingeing on carbs or sugar, or whatever the filler is, grief will arise and only asks that it be respected in its surfacing. When we suppress it, it only festers. It can backfire on us as self-sabotage and returning to what’s been harming us, even when we know that it’s harmful.

The feeling of loss is natural, and the only way beyond our current life is to move and feel our way through the challenges, and triumphs, of change.

"Grow through what you go through."

Tears will rise. Shakiness will occur. Emptiness may be felt in the body, in the mind, even in the spirit, and this is simply a part of the process of letting go, but we let go because we know when we’re ready.

Ready for life without what we use to avoid feeling grief itself, whether it’s that co-dependent or abusive relationship, or that job that’s sucking our soul, or the coffee, sugar, smokes, or drinks that we depend upon to make it through our days that in all reality are exhausting us and enabling our own self-destruction.

There are ways we can make this process easier. Here are some of them.

Holistic Tools to Ease the Process of Change & Grief

"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things could fall together."

 👉🏼 Let yourself feel whatever arises without the need to enact upon the sensations and emotions. Can you ground into feeling what surfaces in your body? Use specific tools to ease chronic angerfear and anxiety, and chronic stress provided in the links.

👉🏼 Be patient with yourself. Give yourself the time and space you need. Ask for it when necessary. 

👉🏼 Reach out to a trusted source for support.

Breathing & Meditation

👉🏼 Consciously breathe. Use abdominal breathing to allow deep movement through the core of the body and lymphatic system to ground, center, and detoxify, to steady through emotions and keep toxins from compiling, which contributes to long-term depression.

👉🏼 Practice mindfulness by holding space for whatever arises in the moment. Practice present awareness through meditation. Practice embodiment to ground and stabilize. Use safe breathing practices that aid all of the above. Use this ten-minute meditation to be guided through these practices.

Specific Yoga Practices

👉🏼 Open your chest. Do some backbends. Move your shoulders up, down, and around. Keep opening this space to protect the heart from prolonged closure and maintaining space for the lungs.

👉🏼 Use this gentle yoga practice to cultivate compassion and create space through the heart channels.

Food & Nutrition

👉🏼 Keep your gut healthy. Give your colon fermented foods and drinks or supplement with pre- and probiotics. Keeping the gut healthy supports overall health and houses the majority of serotonin and dopamine, supporting healthy moods to protect from the risk of prolonged depression.

👉🏼 Identify inflammatory foods, such as gluten, dairy, corn, sugar, alcohol, and processed foods by eliminating one at a time for at least three weeks and reintroducing into the diet to feel its effects. What is causing harm is then obvious and will need to be eliminated entirely to allow the body to heal. A plan and support through this process can be crucial!

Letting Go is the Only Way to Create Space for New

Banksy Image of girl reaching out toward a red, heart-shaped balloon that she has let go.

Letting go is necessary through every stage of our lives if we wish to expand, grow, and evolve throughout our lifetime. Letting go is the only way we allow new people and places, relationships, experiences, tastes, sounds, smells, skills and knowledge, to enter our lives because to experience new, we must let go of what is familiar.

Letting go is key to experiencing lightness and ease. Trust is its foundation.

When one door is closed, don't you know, another is open

When we don’t give ourselves the time and space to process loss, we jeopardize our allowance of new in our lives, as a way to protect ourselves from the potential of loss in the future.
 
We can feel denial as a way to protect us from shock. Loss can shake trust in ourselves, in others, in the universe or “god.” It can make us angry. Yet ultimately, it offers an opportunity to root deeper and grow our capacity for empathy, love, peace, and joy, once we are able to integrate the process into acceptance. 

Life is like the lungs and the colon—it brings new in, and it takes it away or we move on. We trust that our inhale will follow our exhale. We trust that our colon will receive nutrients from our food before letting go of the waste matter.

Can you trust that life will fill in the space of whatever has left with what you most need to fulfill the you that you are constantly growing into? Can you rest into this trust, that the universe has your back, and that you have your own back by feeling what you need to feel and giving love and care to yourself?

If you’re ready to accept some guidance and support through lifestyle changes while embracing all of the emotions that arise through the process, check out the Holistic Liberation Program that provides exactly that.

Otherwise, reach out. Join the Facebook group or schedule a call with me to see what we can do to make things a little easier for you.

"You're always one decision away from a totally different life."

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